Thank You, Goodnight: The Bon Jovi Story — Even die-hard fans will lose patience with this bloated docuseries

An epic, four-part saga, two years in the making, Thank You, Goodnight: The Bon Jovi Story (Disney+, from Friday, April 26) does exactly what it says in the title. Well, sort of. To the best of my knowledge, the Bon Jovi story isn’t yet over.

A new album is on the way, and the boys will probably tour again. Why the ‘Goodnight’ bit, then? Your guess is as good as mine.

This enormous, “all access docuseries” is, essentially, a celebration of the divisive hard rock favourites, and that’s fine.

When the cameras started rolling, Jon Bon Jovi and pals were closing in on the band’s 40th anniversary, and any group that’s been around that long deserves to have its story told. It’s a good one, but they probably didn’t need five hours to tell it.

At its best, Thank You, Goodnight… is educational, informative, overflowing with fascinating nuggets about the group’s origins in Sayreville, New Jersey.

Thank You, Goodnight: The Bon Jovi Story - Official Trailer

For the first hour or so, it tricks us into thinking it might be fun. It reminds us that, for two whole album cycles, Bon Jovi barely bothered the US Top 40.

It was only after the award-winning American hitmaker Desmond Child entered the equation in 1986, co-writing the band’s signature hits (You Give Love a Bad Name, Livin’ on a Prayer) with Jon and his right-hand man, guitarist Richie Sambora, that things went supernova.

It’s Jon’s childhood pal David Bryan, the band’s renowned keyboardist, who tells all the best stories, and the accomplished music maker lights up whenever he talks about the days before they hit the big-time.

How, for instance, when they were teenagers, he and Jon would perform anywhere that would have them, and without a single original tune in their set.

Once, they duetted with Bruce Springsteen. Another time, they arrived home from a show at 5am, set an alarm for 7am, and danced into high school, their ears still ringing from the night before.

Jon worshipped Springsteen — they all did, and The Boss lends a helpful hand here as a talking head. But Jon wanted to be his own man, and this series looks at how he and his buddy David knocked on every label’s door until finally, someone answered. It helped, obviously, that one of Jon’s family members ran a famous recording studio in New York.

At its worst, Thank You, Goodnight… devotes far too much time to the present. The 2022 Jon Bon Jovi is stressed, exhausted, his vocals not quite what they used to be. A relentless touring schedule has taken its toll — so, too, has a rotten bout of Covid-19, and as the band rehearses for a sold-out US tour, Jon explains how he’s doing everything he can to protect and preserve his voice and, indeed, his legacy.

We watch him perform relentless tongue exercises. We wait while he points lasers at his throat and attends virtual medical appointments. We are reminded, basically, that sometimes, it’s best not to peek behind the rock ‘n’ roll curtain.

It’s one thing for a band to talk about what made them great — it’s another to almost bore your audience to tears with stories about how hard it is to keep on rockin’

It’s one thing for a band to talk about what made them great — it’s another to almost bore your audience to tears with stories about how hard it is to keep on rockin’. But this series is baggy, shapeless, far too earnest, and it’s constantly getting in its own way.

It teases big reveals that take far too long to surface. See, for instance, Sambora’s contribution. The guitarist is interviewed here about his departure from the band in 2013. Fair enough, and there may yet be some interesting anecdotes up ahead, but I’ve watched 152 minutes of this series and, for the most part, it’s an infuriating slog.

Jon’s contribution, meanwhile, is extraordinarily indulgent. There are one too many slow-mo shots from rehearsals; one too many lines about how, on a good day, he’s the best front man in the business.

His confidence is off the charts, but it occasionally borders on arrogance, and you come away from his company annoyed, irritated and not at all entertained.

A better producer might have made a difference — a decent editor, too. As it stands, it’s difficult not to imagine the Bon Jovi die-hards losing patience with this bloated, uneven presentation.

Nice stuff out of Springsteen, though. The Boss is always a treat.

Thank You, Goodnight: The Bon Jovi Story premieres on Disney+ on Friday, April 26